Since my last post a few weeks ago alot has happened...
But it's late, so contrary to my usual blogger style, I'm just going to leave a reader's digest version of what has been and currently is going on in my life.
My parents separation has been really hard on me, and it has been really hard on my family as well. I found that I couldn't handle everything that I was dealing with emotionally, and not being with my family. So I ended up quitting my job at Hope Mission a few weeks ago so I could move up to Fort McMurray to be with my family. I felt awful about quitting work with zero notice, and while my co-workers were aware of my family situation, I know that they weren't impressed when I left them high and dry. However, I knew that I was in no condition emotionally to work with the youth every day and give 100% to them--especially after I had realized that I didn't want to continue working at Hope Mission in the fall (see last post for more info on that).
When I intially came up to Fort McMurray I had been able to get a really good paying job at Payless Shoes (of all places). But due to some unforseen circumstances (aka. a massive flood in the store), that door has since been closed.
So I'm in Fort McMurray for the rest of the summer. And I don't have a job--but I need to make money in the event I'm in school in the fall. And I'm glad that I'm here with my family, and I'm making an effort to spend time with them and be close to them. But part of me doesn't really want to be here. Fort McMurray doesn't feel like home anymore, especially with my dad not living in our house. Every where I go I bump into people that know about my parents' separation, and I feel like they want me to look really upset about everything and I usually don't. I want to be here and be with my family, but I also know that I need to make sure that I am taking care of my own emotional health. I have a tendancy to overlook myself in that regard, and to escape by focusing on other people's problems. I've only been up here permanently for a few days, and I really, really miss Andrew. Sometimes I wonder if coming up here was a huge mistake.
But I'm up here, and I am trying to do what I came to do: Spend time with my parents and my sister, and work through some of my own emotions.
I guess I'm just feeling discouraged. I feel like I brought some of this on myself, but at the same time I feel like coming up here was the right thing to do, and the only thing to do to deal with the hurt and sadness that this whole situation has made me feel.
So this is the reader's digest version....I guess this blog is really just a call for prayer. I need prayer, my family needs prayer. I will try to post updates on my blog as things unfold over the course of the summer. Thank you to everyone who reads my blog for reading this post and for bringing me before God.
Monday, July 21, 2008
Friday, July 4, 2008
The good ol' summer time
I feel really badly for neglecting this blog for the past few months. But I guess the important thing is that I'm writing something now :)
This summer is almost over (well just half over if you're in university), and it's been pretty good so far. There's too much to write in a blog, so I'll break it down into high points, low points, and neutral things.
High Points (in no particular order)
1. I've been able to go to two weddings so far this summer :) I love going to weddings (mostly to steal really neat ideas for when I get married), and the Allan-Carla and Dustin-Alicia weddings were wonderful affairs. Congratulations to them both once again :)
2. I've been able to reconnect with friends as they migrate to Edmonton. My close friends Amy and Chris are both moving down to Edmonton this summer, and I've been able to spend more time with them over this past summer than I have all year :) It feels great to have reconnected with them, and I'm very excited that they'll both be living down here (separately) come September.
3. My trip to Bahamas with my dad :) My trip to Bahamas was especially meaningful to me because I was able to spend some 1-on-1 time with my dad, and also because I was able to see almost all of my family on my dad's side :) We were able to spend alot of time catching up and reminiscing, and I even got to go swimming with sharks! An unexpected surprise was the way that my cousin Afiba and I bonded over the course of the week :) We're now good friends, and he will be coming up from Florida to visit me next week :)
Low Points
1. My parents officially separated just before Father's Day in June. I understand why they need to be separate, and I support them in doing what they need to do for themselves, but it really hurts.
2. Andrew's work schedule has been crazy since May, and has also been a low point of the summer. It's hard to see each other sometimes, and when he's free I'm not the only person who wants his time and attention. However, his crazy work schedule could be seen as a positive because it has caused us to work harder at communicating with one another.
3. Waiting to find out if I'm going to be in law school in the fall. Enough said.
Neutral Points
The only neutral point of this summer has been my job. There have been weeks that I have wanted to walk out and quit, and other weeks that I have left work genuinely satisfied and excited with what God is doing in our youth. At this point I don't know if I will continue to work at the HMYS if I am not accepted into law school in the fall, which makes it difficult to come into work some days. But despite how I feel, I'm trusting that God has a reason for me being there this summer, and I want to be faithful to where he's placed me for the time being.
This summer is almost over (well just half over if you're in university), and it's been pretty good so far. There's too much to write in a blog, so I'll break it down into high points, low points, and neutral things.
High Points (in no particular order)
1. I've been able to go to two weddings so far this summer :) I love going to weddings (mostly to steal really neat ideas for when I get married), and the Allan-Carla and Dustin-Alicia weddings were wonderful affairs. Congratulations to them both once again :)
2. I've been able to reconnect with friends as they migrate to Edmonton. My close friends Amy and Chris are both moving down to Edmonton this summer, and I've been able to spend more time with them over this past summer than I have all year :) It feels great to have reconnected with them, and I'm very excited that they'll both be living down here (separately) come September.
3. My trip to Bahamas with my dad :) My trip to Bahamas was especially meaningful to me because I was able to spend some 1-on-1 time with my dad, and also because I was able to see almost all of my family on my dad's side :) We were able to spend alot of time catching up and reminiscing, and I even got to go swimming with sharks! An unexpected surprise was the way that my cousin Afiba and I bonded over the course of the week :) We're now good friends, and he will be coming up from Florida to visit me next week :)
Low Points
1. My parents officially separated just before Father's Day in June. I understand why they need to be separate, and I support them in doing what they need to do for themselves, but it really hurts.
2. Andrew's work schedule has been crazy since May, and has also been a low point of the summer. It's hard to see each other sometimes, and when he's free I'm not the only person who wants his time and attention. However, his crazy work schedule could be seen as a positive because it has caused us to work harder at communicating with one another.
3. Waiting to find out if I'm going to be in law school in the fall. Enough said.
Neutral Points
The only neutral point of this summer has been my job. There have been weeks that I have wanted to walk out and quit, and other weeks that I have left work genuinely satisfied and excited with what God is doing in our youth. At this point I don't know if I will continue to work at the HMYS if I am not accepted into law school in the fall, which makes it difficult to come into work some days. But despite how I feel, I'm trusting that God has a reason for me being there this summer, and I want to be faithful to where he's placed me for the time being.
Tuesday, April 29, 2008
Another one Bites the Dust
I got a letter from the University of Alberta today rejecting me (once again) from admission to the Faculty of Law.
Naturally I'm disappointed, because I would have really liked to be back at U of A and to stay in Edmonton for law school. But thankfully I applied to 4 schools this year instead of just one or two.
So it's one down....three to go.
I am waiting to hear "yea" or "nea" from Queen's University and from York University, and I am waiting to hear if I made it onto the waiting list for the University of Calgary (because I made it through the first round of scrutineers!).
If you want to pray for me, please pray that God's will would be done in all of this. And also please pray that I would be content in whatever that turns out to be.
Naturally I'm disappointed, because I would have really liked to be back at U of A and to stay in Edmonton for law school. But thankfully I applied to 4 schools this year instead of just one or two.
So it's one down....three to go.
I am waiting to hear "yea" or "nea" from Queen's University and from York University, and I am waiting to hear if I made it onto the waiting list for the University of Calgary (because I made it through the first round of scrutineers!).
If you want to pray for me, please pray that God's will would be done in all of this. And also please pray that I would be content in whatever that turns out to be.
Friday, April 25, 2008
I'm really bad at this....a year in review
I guess I'm pretty bad at blogging...my last post was over a year ago!!
So rather than write more than anyone can read (or wants to), I'll do a brief summary of what this past year has been like for me:
The love of my life
Andrew and I are still dating :) It has been just about 18months (18 months on the 28th of April!), and we have had some pretty rough times this year. But despite everything that we have gone through, we've been able to be there for each other and to make it through some pretty crazy things. We were originally hoping to get engaged sometime this summer, but Andrew (being Andrew) wants to save up more money for the "perfect" engagement ring, and to also have a bit of a nest egg stashed away for when we get married. So rather than getting married when he graduates in 2009, we're looking at 2010...and beyond *sigh*
My school life
By the end of summer 2007, I had been told by all the institutions that I had applied to that I had not been accepted for the 2007 intake. It was really hard to accept at first, and there are times that I still struggle with not having been accepted...again. Thankfully God has surrounded me with very supportive friends and family who have never made me feel for a second that I am a failure because of this. On that note I have decided to get back on the horse for another shot. I have applied to U of A, U of C, Queen's University, and York University for the 2008 intake into law school. It seems a bit late not to have heard ANYTHING back from any one (besides a "we have your application, thanks"), but I am choosing to believe that I did the right thing in applying...again, and that if this is what God wants for me, then it will happen. I will definitely try to give an update on the acceptance/rejection situation with law school when I find out.
My work life
Although I enjoyed working at Bosecke Song LLP, and I am still wanting to become a lawyer, I ended up quitting in the early part of November in 2007. My wonderful boss, Baerach, ended up leaving the practice for a more luecrative career as a consultant. It was a really difficult transition on me (especially since alot of his files had not been closed out yet!), and in the end the new lawyer I was partnered with was not a good match for me. Starting November 18, 2007, I became an employee of the Hope Mission Youth Shelter. The Hope Mission is a Christian non-profit organization that cares for homeless men, women, and youth in Edmonton's inner city by providing emergency shelter, transitional housing, meals, and additional supports.I applied for the job because I wanted a change from the high-paced world of real estate law, and also because I wanted to feel like I was making a difference in the world around me. I ended up getting the job a week after I applied for it, and I could tell from the beginning that this was where God wanted me to be. I started out working nights at the shelter, from 9pm to 9am, and my rotation was 4 on 4 off. Needless to say, this made things difficult for my social life, but Andrew was very understanding, and I think he even got used to spending time with me when I was comatose. Starting in February 2008, the youth shelter opened its own transitional program for homeless youth called SHIFT. I was asked to start working day shifts and to assist in the program. Right now my days consist of hanging out with 6 guys (ages 18-24), and my 3 male coworkers....and alot of testosterone as a by-product. Working 9am-9pm (4 on 4 off) has allowed me to sleep in my own bed at night, but it has also made it even more difficult to spend time with my friends and with Andrew. Although there are challenges, I know that this is where God has called me to be for now, and so I am trying to delight in my work and to present it as an offering to Him.
That's basically my life in a nutshell right now. I go to work, I spend time with Andrew and my friends on my days off. I will hopefully be going to the Bahamas in June for my Aunt Nina's graduation from med school (and to soak up some much needed rays), but besides that it looks like it will be a fairly quiet summer. I hope this update provides you faithful blog surfers with a much overdue reward.
Sarah
So rather than write more than anyone can read (or wants to), I'll do a brief summary of what this past year has been like for me:
The love of my life
Andrew and I are still dating :) It has been just about 18months (18 months on the 28th of April!), and we have had some pretty rough times this year. But despite everything that we have gone through, we've been able to be there for each other and to make it through some pretty crazy things. We were originally hoping to get engaged sometime this summer, but Andrew (being Andrew) wants to save up more money for the "perfect" engagement ring, and to also have a bit of a nest egg stashed away for when we get married. So rather than getting married when he graduates in 2009, we're looking at 2010...and beyond *sigh*
My school life
By the end of summer 2007, I had been told by all the institutions that I had applied to that I had not been accepted for the 2007 intake. It was really hard to accept at first, and there are times that I still struggle with not having been accepted...again. Thankfully God has surrounded me with very supportive friends and family who have never made me feel for a second that I am a failure because of this. On that note I have decided to get back on the horse for another shot. I have applied to U of A, U of C, Queen's University, and York University for the 2008 intake into law school. It seems a bit late not to have heard ANYTHING back from any one (besides a "we have your application, thanks"), but I am choosing to believe that I did the right thing in applying...again, and that if this is what God wants for me, then it will happen. I will definitely try to give an update on the acceptance/rejection situation with law school when I find out.
My work life
Although I enjoyed working at Bosecke Song LLP, and I am still wanting to become a lawyer, I ended up quitting in the early part of November in 2007. My wonderful boss, Baerach, ended up leaving the practice for a more luecrative career as a consultant. It was a really difficult transition on me (especially since alot of his files had not been closed out yet!), and in the end the new lawyer I was partnered with was not a good match for me. Starting November 18, 2007, I became an employee of the Hope Mission Youth Shelter. The Hope Mission is a Christian non-profit organization that cares for homeless men, women, and youth in Edmonton's inner city by providing emergency shelter, transitional housing, meals, and additional supports.I applied for the job because I wanted a change from the high-paced world of real estate law, and also because I wanted to feel like I was making a difference in the world around me. I ended up getting the job a week after I applied for it, and I could tell from the beginning that this was where God wanted me to be. I started out working nights at the shelter, from 9pm to 9am, and my rotation was 4 on 4 off. Needless to say, this made things difficult for my social life, but Andrew was very understanding, and I think he even got used to spending time with me when I was comatose. Starting in February 2008, the youth shelter opened its own transitional program for homeless youth called SHIFT. I was asked to start working day shifts and to assist in the program. Right now my days consist of hanging out with 6 guys (ages 18-24), and my 3 male coworkers....and alot of testosterone as a by-product. Working 9am-9pm (4 on 4 off) has allowed me to sleep in my own bed at night, but it has also made it even more difficult to spend time with my friends and with Andrew. Although there are challenges, I know that this is where God has called me to be for now, and so I am trying to delight in my work and to present it as an offering to Him.
That's basically my life in a nutshell right now. I go to work, I spend time with Andrew and my friends on my days off. I will hopefully be going to the Bahamas in June for my Aunt Nina's graduation from med school (and to soak up some much needed rays), but besides that it looks like it will be a fairly quiet summer. I hope this update provides you faithful blog surfers with a much overdue reward.
Sarah
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